Keep Calm and Carry On – Guest List Dilemma

By KittyKanzashi

So before deciding on your venue you have to decide on the number of guests you would like to be present at your wedding.  This can not possibly cause any trouble whatsoever…….. or can it?

Maybe your family have grand ideas!  Or maybe it is you who wants the big wedding whereas your other half is just happy with just a handful of friends.  Then there is of course who to invite but that will be another topic of discussion.  In this post we will concentrate on just the numbers.

What do you do?  Clearly you have to decide on one or the other because your venue choice is depended on the guest list.  Now as much as I enjoy a good argument I think in this case it might not be suitable.  There are a number of factors you could consider.


Of course the most easiest way to decide on guest numbers is with your budget.  The more guests you want the more money you will need to spend.  It is really that simply.

Time Spent on a Guest

This may sound a bit silly but you have to consider how much time you would like to spend with each guest because the more guest you have the less time you will have with each one.  I have heard of one couple where their families just invited every living relative and friend they knew to the wedding and the couple spent the whole wedding day just posing for photographs which annoyed the bride so much, she actually stormed off.  They consequently planned a second wedding party to make up for the first one.


Generally the smaller the wedding the more intimate it is which is great if all of your guests get along with each other.  There is nothing more uncomfortable then awkward silence from everybody.  So if your guest list is a bit fractured then maybe inviting a few more people so that everyone has a group where they can belong is a good idea.


Does your family have a tradition whether cultural or social of throwing huge parties?  I had this little problem when I was planning my wedding because I come from a culture where you pretty much invited every single living relative no matter how distance they are.  This to me sounded like hell on Earth because all I will be doing on my wedding day is talking to relatives which I have not seen for over 20 years.

Potential Location

Maybe you have an idea of where you would like to have your wedding which could put a constraint on the number of guests.  For example, maybe you would like to get married in a quaint little village but this place could have a finite number of guests accommodations available in so many miles radius.  I think it would be a little rude to leave your guest without a roof over their head.  Sure it is their responsibility to book the room but it would be nice to give them some choice.

I think those are the ones that I could come up with off the top of my head.  By all means you can have a panic when you are discussing these factors but in the end of the day “Keep Calm”.  Nothing will be achieved if you are constantly panicking especially at this stage of planning.  There is a whole load more to discuss!

Isla Wong
(aka Kitty Kanzashi)

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Posted on October 16, 2012, in kittykanzashi, wedding planning, WedEclectic and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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